


The Times Alfred and Matthew Switched Places and the One Time They Got Caught

by AlexHosler



Series: AlexHosler's ヘタリア (Hetalia) Writings! [3]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: ??? - Freeform, Adoption, America is a Dad, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, At the same time, Children, Depression, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Eating Disorders, FACE Family, Feel-good, Gen, Gender Confusion, Gender Dysphoria, Gender Identity, Gender Issues, Genderqueer, Genderqueer Character, Germany's tired, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, I'll think of more tags in like ten seconds, Mental Anguish, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Not Beta Read, Not legally, Protective America (Hetalia), Protective Canada (Hetalia), Protective Parents, References to Depression, Social Anxiety, Spain adopts Alfred, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, Therapy, Trans mention, Why isn't that a tag already?, and a mom, it's cute though, no politics, not gonna lie, protective children, therapist, welp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:14:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26451676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexHosler/pseuds/AlexHosler
Summary: 「America had social anxiety and depression.This wasn't too much of a surprise, since most of the teenagers in America had one or the other or both.Neither of the other countries, besides Canada, knew about this. They never even considered it.Canada was quiet during world meetings, that's for sure. Almost no one knew he was there.What if they changed places?[...]They did it countless times but only got caught once.」
Relationships: America & Canada & England & France (Hetalia), America & Canada & Mexico (Hetalia), America & Canada (Hetalia), America & England (Hetalia), America & USA States (Hetalia), Canada/Prussia (Hetalia), England & France (Hetalia), England/France (Hetalia)
Series: AlexHosler's ヘタリア (Hetalia) Writings! [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1913362
Comments: 4
Kudos: 149





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and thank you for joining me for this little fanfic I'm making! It's a pleasure having you here, I hope you enjoy!

America had social anxiety and depression.

This wasn't too much of a surprise, since most of the teenagers in America had one or the other or both.

Neither of the other countries, besides Canada, knew about this. They never even considered it.

Canada was quiet during world meetings, that's for sure. Almost no one knew he was there.

What if they changed places?

Those times when Alfred thought it was too much to handle?

The times when Alfred needed to _not_ be the centre of attention but wherever he went he was?

The times when all he wanted was to snuggle and feel safe and warm?

Well, Matthew could just take his place for a while.

Their system worked fairly well, actually.

They were very good actors.

Even Kumajirou was in on the whole plot. He was actually a great help, as long as he got paid in fish.

They did it countless times but only got caught once.

\---

_*Switcheroo Number One*_

"Mattie! Bro! Let's go have lunch together!"

Canada looked up from straightening out his notes. "Eh? Alright, Alfred… I know a place where we can get some food…"

"It better not be Québec because I suck at French!"

The other nations were looking around, trying to tell which country America was speaking to.

"Alfred, we're in Ontario now… why would we go all the way to Québec?" Matthew let out a small laugh.

The two walked out of the meeting room, leaving behind confused occupants.

_*At the diner*_

"How've you been feeling? You look kind of tired."

Alfred finally let himself be himself and he slumped on the table, sighing. "My anxiety kept me up last night, thinking about all the ways I would accidentally trip or fall or make a fool out of myself or have everyone laugh at me or-"

"I won't laugh at you. I know you have a legitimate presentation prepared every time."

"Yeah, but I can never _present_ it. You know, the thing that is like, I dunno, seventy-five percent of the work?"

"You're lucky; at least you get to have a chance to present. We're in Canada for a meeting and I'm still ignored..."

"Dude, we should switch bodies then!"

"I don't think that's possible, Al..."

Alfred sighed and then looked carefully at Matthew.

"Maybe it is! Bro, can we switch clothes?! And act as each other?! We have similar bodies and hairstyles, so this could work! You could get to be heard and I could be invisible for once!"

"Eh, it could work. Let's try the clothes first."

_*In the diner bathroom*_

"Bro, your clothes are so comfortable… I might cry."

"Not too bad. I feel a little dressed up but not too bad."

The two brothers came out of the stalls and inspected each other. America was now wearing Canada's hoodie and leggings while Canada was wearing America's leggings, t-shirt and signature jacket.

"Bro, you look like me!"

"Except for the curls. Mine's way too obvious."

Alfred came up to Matthew and fished around in the jacket he was wearing. He made a noise of achievement and pulled out a bottle of hair gel. "So we're gonna slick them back! No curl for both of us means no difference between us! And, dude, I don't know about you but I am never going to cut this sensitive little thing off."

"I try not to touch mine, I'm not cutting it off. I'm scared of what would happen if I did."

The brothers fell silent, awkwardly looking at the other.

"Gel them in the stalls?"

"Yes please."

_*After a few awkward minutes of gelling their curls back and calming themselves down*_

"I'll have to get used to that, it feels so weird. Kind of like lube-"

"Jesus Christ, Mattie!" Alfred yelled. "You'll have to calm down your perviness while you're me, I'm actually pretty innocent."

Matthew sighed and raised an eyebrow. "Anything else you want to warn me about?"

"I'm still a virgin."

"WHAT!" Matthew clutched the sink and took a deep breath. "You mean you've never experienced the feeling of-"

"Whatever you're about to describe is going to scar me for life so, please, don't. I really don't need to know what my brother does in the bedroom."

"Oh, it isn't just in the _bedroom-_ "

"WHATEVER, JUST BE QUIET!" Alfred yelled with a bright red face. "You are certainly France's son, dude. TMI."

"I suppose I should warn you about a few things then. Hmm, where to start?"

"I'm a little terrified."

"It's not that bad! Okay, so, during meetings I: Sit in a chair--I'm occasionally sat on by Russia, by the way, so you have to protest quietly and poke him--uh, oh yeah! Père sometimes likes to dress me up… in literal dresses or anything he finds adorable."

Matthew continued explaining what his relationships with other countries were as they sat down again. Alfred sighed as he gave him a written list on what he was currently fighting with everyone about.

_*Five minutes before the meeting*_

"Holy shit, we're actually doing this." Alfred whispered, holding Kumajirou and staring at the building before them.

"Eh, I just have to act like you while you're hiding your true feelings away. Don't laugh?" Matthew looked at Alfred, who grinned and cuddled Kumajirou more. "God, this is going to be so bad," He sighed and seemed to psyche himself before putting an arm around Alfred's shoulder and yelling, "DON'T WORRY, MATTIE, YOUR HERO WILL WALK YOU TO THE MEETING ROOM! I LIKE HAMBURGERS AND FRIES AND SHAKES!"

Alfred shook with laughter as he hid his face in Kumajirou's fur.

"You promised you wouldn't laugh!"

"I promised nothing. Oh, make your double 't's more into a 'd' sound, so Mattie would sound like Maddie. Oh yeah, Minnesota sounds like Minneso'd'a. Even though it only has one t. Don't ask me why."

"Oh right."

"It also sounds like you're referring to yourself in third person twice! One with the hero facade and the other with your own name!"

Matthew pondered that and gaped slightly. "Eh, I'll just have to not mess up."

"Stop saying 'eh', I don't say it as much as you! Well, there _are_ Michiganders… Eh, oh well. Oh yeah, and mess your English up as much as you can without _completely_ making it gibberish."

"We have a minute left," Matthew said worriedly, glancing at his watch--which was now on America's wrist. "We should start to go up."

Alfred bounced on his heels. "No, I'm usually late. I get all of these nerves from being late and having so much negative attention on me but I can't help breaking a habit--plus do you see how mad Iggy gets?!"

"Do I really have to call him _Iggy_?"

"You're me, of course you do!" America said with a smile, his shaking hands holding Kumajirou as he watched the second hand on the watch click past the meeting reconvening time. "Okay, we're officially late. When do you wanna change back?"

"After the meeting should be fine. We can say that we want to finish talking to each other at my house."

"Sounds good to me!" America gave a bright smile and handed a shake to Canada. "It's the maple shake, 100% maple syrup. It's your country, after all! Well, my country for the time being."

"Oh, yay! Thank you! I love these!"

America smirked at Canada, who was happily slurping the shake as they went up the stairs. "Okay, Alfred, time to get this show started!"

"Sometimes I hate myself." Canada muttered with a pout and tugged on the jacket collar.

"Same."

The two looked at each other awkwardly.

"Never mention that again?" America offered.

"Of course," Canada sighed as they started to turn down the hallway leading to the meeting room. "We've done this before as children, how hard can it be? Besides, you're fluent in French because of all of the immigrants in your country so we'll be able to pull this off."

"In case you can't tell, we're not little children anymore, Mattie."

"Excellent observation, Al. I'm just saying that we were able to perfect the act when we were younger, so we should be able to do it now."

"Let's just get this over with. We've even bribed your polar bear into the act."

"Fish. Who are you?" Kumajirou licked his nose and let out a little giggle.

America beat Canada to it and replied quietly, "I'm Canada…"

The two reached the door and completely shifted into the other's role. "Go on in, _US of A_."

Canada let himself sigh before he slammed the door open. "THE HERO'S HERE, YOU CAN START THE MEETING PROPERLY NOW!"

America shuffled quietly into the room, muttering, "I'm sorry, j'ai désolé…" Then sat himself in a chair next to France.

"YO IGGY, DUDE, DID YA MISS ME?!" Canada internally shuddered as he slurped the shake loudly. Such terrible manners! He saw Alfred slightly snicker down the table as he draped himself over a chair and got a squeak from England.

"Same as always, America! You know, you could be more like your brother and learn some manners, er…"

Canada's eye twitched. Of course.

"Canada." America supplied quietly, only four of them really hearing him.

"Hm? Oh yeah, Canadia! Sorry about that, you kind of seem to disappear…!"

"Who could forget a pretty face like this?" France cooed, squishing Alfred's cheeks. "Ahonhonhonhon~ Mathieu~ Mon fils~"

"Père…" Alfred said awkwardly, hoping for someone to save him. If he were in his own facade he probably would've pushed France away by now, screaming bloody murder. It was nice to get some nice attention, though, so he allowed his cheeks to be mauled and barely protested when he was pulled into a hug.

In the background, Canada was really getting into his role with arguing with England--sometimes he was a real git, so he longed to do this at times--and both were very content with the switch.


	2. 2

_*Switcheroo Number Seventeen*_

"AND SO I PROPOSE A ROBOT TO SAVE THE EARTH!" Alfred yelled, hiding his shaking hands in his jacket pockets.

"America, please sit down," Germany sighed, looking disappointed. "Honestly, for someone who represents such a world power nation…"

Alfred's eyes widened minisculely as he sat down. _Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry! You're used to this! Someday you'll be able to actually present!_

"Alfred, ¿necesitas cambiar de roles durante el próximo descanso? Estás temblando, hermano." (Alfred, do you need to switch roles during the next break? You're shaking, brother.)

"Yes," Alfred whispered softly to Canada, ignoring Arthur's and Francis's eyes. "¿Cuándo es el próximo descanso? Estaba… fuera de lugar… mientras que eso podría haber sido dicho." (When is the next break? I was… zoned out… while that may have been said.)

Matthew looked at his watch and whispered, "En cinco minutos, ¿podrás hacerlo hasta entonces? Realmente no te ves muy bien." (In five minutes, will you be able to make it until then? You really don't look too great.)

"Yo debería ser. Si no, arrástrame de la habitación sin importar qué y di que algo importante surgió." (I should be. If not, drag me from the room no matter what and say that something important came up.)

Matthew's face became more serious as he whispered, "You really should tell someone… a doctor? At least a medical professional? This has been going on long enough, Alfred-"

"¡Habla en Español, idiota!" (Speak in Spanish, idiot!) America's voice raised a little but dropped back down when he saw Russia's attention turn to them. "No me gusta el hecho de que alguien pueda entender lo que estamos hablando." (I don't like the fact that someone might catch onto what we're talking about.)

"Alfred, you know…"

"¡Español!" Alfred hissed.

"Sí, sí, lo siento," (Yes, yes, I'm sorry,) Matthew's cheeks puffed out and he pouted. "Sabes que algunas naciones hablan español, ¿sí?" (You know that some nations speak Spanish, yes?) 

America crossed his arms and huffed. "¡Sí, pero nunca aparecen o se sientan un poco lejos de nosotros o no prestan atención! Además, los únicos dos en los que puedo pensar que estarían lo suficientemente cerca de nosotros serían España y México, ¡y no creo que nos delaten!" (Yes, but they either never show up or they sit quite a bit away from us or don't pay attention at all! Besides, the only two I can think of that would be close enough to us would be Spain and Mexico and I don't think they would rat us out!)

Matthew threw his hands in the air. "¡Multa! Al menos sabemos que Francia no sabe Español… era casi demasiado terco para aprender inglés. E Iggy está… demasiado ocupada con Francia para que nos hagamos caso." (Fine! At least we know that France doesn't know Spanish… he was almost too stubborn to learn English. And Iggy is… too busy with France to pay us any mind.)

America quietly giggled, looking at the two mentioned. "Cierto." (True.)

"Since we can't seem to concentrate, we'll go on break. Be back in an hour!"

"Ve~ Germany, Germany, Germany, let's go get pasta~! They serve great potatoes too~!"

The two North American countries bailed before England and France could even blink, nevertheless turn around and question them.

_*After the switcheroo*_

"Hey, Mathieu, Alfred, you two looked like you were fighting earlier. What's wrong?"

"It's fine, Père, we both were a little hangry." Alfred said with a small smile, hugging Kumajirou close to him.

Matthew made a strange noise in his throat and threw Alfred a dirty look. He eyed their parents and the close nations around them. He certainly couldn't speak in English or French. Spanish was too risky, since Spain and Romano were a few feet away from them. So he angrily signed in ASL (American Sign Language), _"Alfred, you really should tell them!"_

_"No way, bro! There's no way they would believe me before laughing at my face and walking away!"_

Canada groaned. _"Give them some credit, they are our 'parents' after all. Aren't they supposed to be looking after us?"_

 _"Great job they're doing, Mr. Forgotten,"_ America then seemed to realize how low that was and hurriedly started apologizing, his hand movements quick and sloppy. _"I'm really really sorry, Mattie, I'm just so wound tight these days and it's getting hard to think because of everything in my brain, I shouldn't have said that anyway and I'm so sorry-"_

Matthew smacked Alfred's hands down. _"Stop apologizing, you're going to start to sound like me,"_ This got Alfred to giggle a little. _"I'll help you tell them when you're ready, okay?"_

America smiled and quietly said, "I can deal with that."

"I don't really know what that was about, but it looks like you two aren't fighting anymore?" England said, glancing between two of his sons.

Alfred glomped onto Matthew and grinned to the other two. "Yeah, we're good!"

France relaxed and pulled the two into a hug of his hug. "Mathieu~ Alfred~ You two!"

"Père…" America sighed in a half-contented, half-annoyed manner. He and Matthew laughed as France pulled England into the hug, the latter loudly protesting.

\---

_*Switcheroo Number Forty*_

"Mathieu, come with me for lunch this time!"

Alfred squeaked as his wrist was seized and he was dragged away, Kumajirou following them while snickering.

"¡Diviértete _vistiéndome!_ ¡Énfasis en la parte del _vestido!_ " (Have fun getting _dressed up!_ Emphasis on the _dress_ part!)

"¡Traidor! ¡No me inscribí para esto!" (Traitor! I didn't sign up for this!)

Matthew laughed boisterously. "¡Oh, pero lo hiciste! Nos vemos~!" (Oh, but you did! See ya~!)

Alfred quietly shouted more curse words in Spanish as he was dragged away.

_*One hour later...*_

"I've never seen you this comfortable in a dress before, mon fils~!"

America looked up from where he was closely inspecting himself in the mirror. "A-ah, I guess this one is more comfortable than the others, Père!"

_Fuck._

Now to add onto his list of Things That Kept Him Up At Night: _I actually kind of like this style?!_

France looked his son over and felt as if something was different. "Mon fils, are you alright?"

"Eh, yeah!" Alfred quickly replied, a flush creeping across his face as he realized how long he had been staring at himself in the mirror. Quick excuse- "I just don't remember if I fed Kumamaru lunch before we left!"

"Fish. Who are you?"

"I'm Canada." America said quietly, picking Kumajirou up and holding him like he would one of his own children.

_*At the meeting*_

_"Call me crazy-"_

_"You're crazy."_

America made a groan in his throat and signed a few impolite words at Canada. _"Now, what I was saying was that I actually kind of like this dress… and you know, kinda feeling… cute."_

 _"You're not crazy, Al, maybe you just didn't realize that you wanted to be like this for a while."_ Canada sighed and looked at America, who was staring at the table after Canada finished. He picked up a rubber band and slingshotted it at America.

"Ouch!" Alfred held his hand up and covered the place where the rubber band had hit.

The other nations looked accusingly at Canada, who was signing across the table to America.

"What are you two doing during a meeting! Pay attention!"

America started shaking a little and whispered, "Sorry!"

_"Alfred, you motherfucker, look at me so I can tell you that you're not crazy!"_

"America, you git, stop terrorizing the girl and pay attention!"

Canada sighed.

_If Alfred looks so cute while wearing a dress, I must look the same. It's not too bad, but I don't like the colours Père picks out._


	3. 3

_*Seventieth switcheroo*_

America tapped three times in a row on the table, making Canada look up from his notes and at him.

_"I want to switch."_

_"Is it because they invited us out to lunch?"_

America smiled wryly and nodded.

_"What if we need to talk about something important?"_

_"Like what?"_

Canada took advantage of the momentary quietness of the room to whisper, "¿Tu bienestar, tal vez?" (Your well-being, maybe?)

"No."

"Alfred, por favor. Por favor dile a alguien!" (Alfred, please. Please tell someone!)

America crossed his arms. "¡No!"

"¡Esto ha ido demasiado lejos! ¡Te vas a matar algún día! ¡Por favor, díselo a alguien!" (This has gone on long enough! You're going to kill yourself someday! Please, you have tell someone about it!)

"Ya sabes, ¿quién más necesita saber?" (You already know, who else needs to know?)

"¡Alguien que pueda ayudarte, maldita sea!" (Someone who can help you, dammit!)

Alfred sighed. "No necesito ayuda. Ahora nos vamos porque todos nos están mirando y vamos a hablar." (I don't need help. Now we're going to leave because everyone's staring at us and we're going to talk.)

Matthew still held his ground. "¿Qué pasa con el almuerzo con Père e Inglaterra?" (What about lunch with Père and England?)

"Podrán encontrarnos, pero tengo que irme _ahora_." (They'll be able to find us, but I need to leave _now_.)

Matthew's face softened and he pulled his brother over the table, dragging him out the door.

Spain and Mexico looked at each other and said a few things in Spanish (it looked as if they were in agreement for once) before following the brothers.

"Vhat is going on?! I thought this vas a vorld meeting!"

"Ve~ Alfred and Matthew have to talk about a few things. I hope that Alfred will be alright!"

Romano nodded in agreement next to his brother. "Di, Feliciano, sembrava che fosse sull'orlo di un attacco di panico." (Say, Feliciano, it looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack.)

"Penso che Alfred abbia ansia, forse ansia sociale," (I think Alfred has anxiety, maybe social anxiety,) Feliciano whispered to Romano, looking at the notes that had scattered during the North American brothers' fight. "Dovremmo ripulirlo, no?" (We should clean that up, shouldn't we?)

The brothers split up on each side of the table and started making the papers neat. Romano picked up the stack to transfer it and a stray paper smaller than the rest fell out. He couldn't help but take a glance at it.

"We were right, Fratello, that and so much more." Romano whispered and handed the list to Feliciano. He pulled out his phone and called Spain.

_"Yeah Romano? Did you need something? If it's sex, it'll have to wait until we're-"_

"I'm not asking for that, tomato bastard!" Romano yelled with a burning face. "Just… have you caught up with Alfred and Matthew yet?"

 _"Hm? Yeah, we're sitting with them right now."_ Romano heard muffled greetings from the other line.

"Yeah, hello. Me and Fratello are coming too, okay? Where are you?"

_"In room 103. It's a small meeting room on the first floor."_

"Okay. We're coming." Feliciano nodded and headed to the door with his brother. The other nations looked at them leaving; France and England made to stand up but Feliciano shot them a glare, making them quickly return to their seats.

_"Be quiet when you come in, okay? Niño's trying to calm himself down."_

"I figured as such," Romano sighed. "What else do you know about his mental and physical health?"

The door clicked shut and the nations of the world shuffled awkwardly.

_*Seventy-first switcheroo*_

Nobody knew what happened that day, but they knew that America was clearly thinking something over very seriously.

America tapped on the table three times, making Canada look up from where he was face-planted on the table. _"Hey Mattie, switch? I want to sit and be away from this life for a while."_

_"Yeah, sure."_

Alfred let a pout settle on his face as he looked at his brother over from across the room. _"Bro, you look tired. Did something happen to you?"_

"Tuve una larga noche probablemente no quieras saberlo." (I had a long night. You probably don't want to know.)

"Estoy seguro de que puedo soportarlo. ¿Qué pasó?" (I'm sure I can take it. What happened?)

Smirk.

Germany sighed and stopped talking as he saw that America and the other nation was completely ignoring the meeting. As he sat, he allowed North Italy to feed him popcorn.

"Bueno, primero, fuimos a la habitación y él me tiró del rizo-" (Well, first, we went to the bedroom and he pulled my curl-)

Alfred flushed and covered his burning ears. "MATTIE! TMI TMI TMI TMI TMI PLEASE STOP I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THIS ABOUT MY BROTHER JESUS CHRIST PLEASE MATTIE!"

"Se subió encima de mí y siguió tirando de mi rizo~" (He climbed on top of me and kept tugging my curl~)

"I GET IT I GET IT I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT NOW PLEASE STOP!"

"No, no, continúa esto. Estoy intrigado~!" (No, no, continue this. I'm intrigued~!)

Canada grinned as he heard Spain's input. "Con mucho gusto," (With much pleasure,) Canada snickered and let out a long, dramatic sigh while fanning himself. "¡Oh, fue una fantasía absoluta hecha realidad, fue tan amable al principio y luego me ató~!" (Oh, it was an absolute fantasy come true, he was so gentle at first and then he tied me up~!)

America screamed and backed away from the advancing Canadian. "YOU'RE CERTAINLY FRANCE'S CHILD I GET IT MATTIE!"

"Goddamit Mathieu, speak in a language I understand!" France said with a tear in his eye. "I want to know~!"

Spain grinned and leaned slid a paper that he was writing on over to France. France's nose started bleeding and 'honhonhonhon~'ed. England looked over at the paper and blinked in surprise.

Japan was wiping the blood away from his nose as he made a manga about the situation, taking in every detail. Hungary was nodding in agreement next to him. The other Spanish-speaking nations had actually shown up and were quietly passing translations around.

Germany sat with a flushed face as Feliciano sat on his lap with the popcorn, feeding him while whispering things very close to his ear.

Matthew leaned close to Alfred and whispered that made him go even redder and scramble away, hiding behind England.

"Who is it Mathieu?!" France shouted, drooling a little. "You can tell your Papa!"

Canada smirked and dragged a stunned Alfred with him. Just before they left the room, he looked over his shoulder and whispered, "I won't tell you, but I can give you two hints: They are a personification but they are not in this room."

With that, he and Alfred were gone. Kumajirou giggled and disappeared after them.

\---

"Dude, that was TMI," Alfred shuddered and dejectedly slurped the chocolate shake. "I really did not want to know that. My poor virgin ears are scarred."

Matthew snickered and drank his maple shake. He was dressed in America's clothes and his curl was slicked back. "Just be glad that I didn't scar another virgin part of your body."

"MATTHEW!" Alfred yelled with burning ears.

"I wouldn't do that to you, you're my brother. Maybe in another fanfic, though."

"We promised we wouldn't talk about those, bro!"

A girl danced behind them, strumming on a ukulele and singing, "Sweet Home Alabama~!"

"Montana, honey, please stop this," Alfred said with a sigh. "I know you like the joke but please do realize that you are singing this to your _dad_ and your _uncle_."

Montana giggled. "But Dad~ the fandom needs it~!"

"No buts. Now, please, get your siblings together before we leave again."

"Sure thing~!" Montana sang and dropped a kiss on both of their cheeks.

She disappeared for a second.

Silence.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THIS?!"

"WHO DID THIS?!"

"I WILL MURDER YOU!"

"MONTANA YOU LITTLE SHIT!"

"I WILL SHOVE FLORIDA UP YOUR ASS!"

"STOP USING ME AS A THREAT!"

 **_"FUCK YOU ALL!"_ ** A voice managed to rise so loud that it stopped all the screams and trampling. "If anyone disrupts my happy time again, we'll have to have a talk."

"Sorry, Michi-Michi."

Michigan huffed and left their room, three blankets around their shoulders--a cat settled on top of the blankets and their head--and a cup of hot chocolate in one hand with tea in the other. "I'm going to say my goodbyes to Papa and Uncle Matt. I should hope all you fuckers learn how to regulate yourselves before joining us."

\---

America was ignored when he re-entered the meeting room with Canada because Canada was screaming about how the hero had arrived and going on a tirade about robots.

He sighed in relief and just dropped in the chair, feeling tired from all of the energy all of the social interaction he had had that day had dragged out of him.

Closing his eyes, he cuddled up close to Kumajirou--who was munching on some fish in his lap--and fell asleep in the chair.

Canada smiled when he saw Alfred asleep in the chair and subtly repositioned him so that he wouldn't be too sore when he woke up.


	4. 4

_*Intervention*_

"I wonder if Papa saw the list we created for him to give to the therapist?"

"I dunno. He hasn't given us any clues about it," Montana laid across the back of the couch and flipped a page in the book she was reading. She sighed and put a bookmark in it. "Honestly, we don't even know if he even booked an appointment with her yet."

"Yeah, his anxiety keeps getting to him."

Texas sighed. "I've had to help him through three separate anxiety attacks at just the thought of going in."

"He thinks he'll be laughed at or turned away or looked at in disgust," California said, he was putting on some makeup. "My eyeliner looks killer, doesn't it?"

"Is that gold?" Alabama asked, leaning in very close. "My God, it is!"

"Eh, looks fantastic, California." Michigan sighed from the couch, not looking up from their book.

"Alex~" Utah sang as Michigan kept ignoring everyone.

"Yes, Little Sister?"

"How's it going with-"

"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UPPPP!" Michigan screamed, grabbing a pillow and thwacking Utah upside the head multiple times. "NOTHING'S HAPPENING!"

"You sang to her over the phone, I heard it!"

Alex paused, grabbing their book and hitting Utah harder. "EH!? YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY DELUSIONAL, YOU WANKER!"

"PILLOW FIGHT!" Texas screamed, grabbing a pillow and hitting Alabama.

Colorado giggled before jumping on Wyoming, yelling, "TO THE DEATH!"

_*At the same time, somewhere else*_

A paper drifted out of Alfred's folder as he was walking. He bent down and picked it up. "I normally don't keep this small piece of paper with me… eh? Isn't this the one Lovino gave back to me? He said it dropped out of my stack of notes and gave him an idea of what I was going through."

_List of Things That Keep Me Awake At Night:_

_(Actually, was it okay to use the word me? I mean, it's not you that's writing this. Jesus Christ, we can't agree on anything. Redo!!!!!)_

Alfred let out a small laugh and leaned up against the wall. The different scribbles told him that multiple of his children were writing the 'list'.

_List of Things That Keep Dad/Mum/Mama/Papa/Pére/お父ちゃん/爸爸/Vati/(you know the rest but this is taking up too much space) Awake At Night:_

_Number One: Insomnia. Literally keeps you awake._

_Number Two: Depression. Because of all of the school teens and everyone else that has depression, this has sadly been replicated into you and many of us._

_Number Three: Stress. Caused by work and life in general._

_Number Four: Work. You actually have quite a lot of it!_

_Number Five: Anxiety. We know this is hard to deal with! Same with Depression._

_Number Six: Gender Identity. Yeah, most of us have gone through this same thing. So what if you like dresses and makeup and suits and eyeliner? Clothes and makeup don't have gender!_

_Number Seven: Bulimia Nervosa. We hear you making yourself throw up in the bathroom after coming out of meetings._

_Please get some help Papa. Please. We know you're in denial and fighting your own mind, but you're only hurting yourself physically and mentally._

_Please, Papa._

_For us?_

_We want you to be happy again--and not that fake happiness you put out there for everyone to see._

_We'll be with you every step of the way, all you have to do is try to cooperate with us._

_Mr. President Barack Obama has offered to help, too. And Lady Michelle and Little Ladies Malia and Sasha. Mr. Vice Prez is coming too._

_We're all worried._

_We know that your mind is telling you that it won't ever be okay but it's wrong. It's sick with a mental flu and needs some medical help. They call it a mental illness because your brain is a little under the weather!_

_We promise that we will all be there for you._

_But please try to get better._

_Please, Dad._

_Please, Papa._

_Please, Vati._

_Please._

_With all of our unconditional love,_

_~Your children._

The paper grew damp as tears dripped from America's eyes. His hands shook as he held the note from his beloved children. From his _family._

\---

_"♪Obama~ Only the greatest~ The very greatest of the great! ♫ He was born in America, we promise! Oh~ Obama, lick my-"_

Canada fumbled with his phone, hurriedly answered the phone before it got to the worst part. "Eh, Barack, what's up?"

_"Did Alfred get to you okay?"_

"He isn't here yet… When did he leave? I assume he was in your office or house or something."

_"He was in the office helping with my paperwork. And by helping, I mean he did all of it again."_

"Again?" Canada sighed and stepped further away from Britain, who was leaning in closer and closer to hear their conversation. "Actually, how has he been?"

_"He's been distant for the past few days."_

"Yeah, I noticed that too," Canada nervously ran a hand through his hair and tapped his foot on the ground. "Do you think it's about the fact that we've been trying to get him to get help?"

France's attention honed in on Canada and his eyes narrowed in thought. As he glanced over at England, he practically saw the gears turning in his head.

_"It might. His offspring wrote a letter for him and tucked it into his folder of notes and unused presentations."_

"Did they now?" Canada's eyebrow rose and he huffed. "I didn't hear anything about them writing him a letter, what was it about?"

_"I think I have a copy around here somewhere--ah, here it is! The states copied it about ten times so that they could deal them out to therapists, doctors, or anybody that decided to help--I believe the Italies have a copy."_

"The Italies?"

Romano and Feliciano looked up at this and waved, Romano holding a piece of paper in his hand. Germany was sighing next to them, head on the table. Japan merely raised an eyebrow delicately--did he know? It was impossible to tell.

"Eh, I see what you mean now, Barack." Canada said. "So what does it say?"

_"Want me to read word for word or summarize it?"_

"Summarize please."

_"So basically they wrote down all of the things that 'keep him awake at night' into a list and at the end they begged for him to get help; the states also told him multiple times that they would be there every step of the way. They added in some other people that would be very happy to help."_

"He doesn't realize that there really are people that want to help him, does he?" Canada choked out a laugh and rubbed the tears from his eyes. "I love him but he's a little dim sometimes."

_"We all do, Matthew."_

"He dealt with this alone for at _least_ fifty years at least before I found out… it must have been absolutely terrible. And it's fifty years since I found out… God, he's dealt with this for more than one hundred years. Someday he might just break, Barack, and I'm scared of that."

_"We all are, Matthew. But he's got us, his closest friends, and his children to try to help him through everything."_

"I don't think he realizes that though," Canada let out a sob and stuffed his face in Kumajirou's fur. "Sorry I'm breaking down on you."

_"Hey, we've all got our own problems and emotions too. How about you call your brother? That'll make you feel better and then you can see him soon."_

"Eh, I guess. Thank you for being my sob buddy again." 

_"It's no problem. But now I have nothing to do in the office. Maybe I'll go make some more friendship bracelets with Joe."_

Canada rubbed the last of his tears away and weakly smiled. "Mm, have fun with that. Don't forget the stitch pattern this time. Goodbye, Barack."

_"Goodbye Matt. Send me an update on your brother."_

"Of course." He hung up and pressed on the number two speed dial.

_Ring…_

_Ring…_

_Ri-_

"Hey, Al." Canada said with a sigh of relief. "I'm glad you picked up, I thought something had happened."

_"Mat-Matthew…"_

Canada immediately started moving towards the door when he heard sniffles and hiccups. "Alfred, what happened? Why are you crying? Do I need to hurt someone? Where are you?"

_"I'm f-fi--fine!"_

"Like _hell_ you are, Alfred. Where are you? I'm coming to you."

_"Some--somewhere o-n the s-second f-floor."_

"Okay, I'm coming," Canada said evenly, but his footsteps to the door quickened--they were in what seemed to be the largest meeting room this time, and it didn't help that he was on the complete opposite side of the room than the door. "I want you to stay on the phone with me, okay? I want to know that you're not doing anything bad to yourself again."

_"Mat--Mattie…"_

Canada sucked in a breath as he dashed through the halls, unaware that there were two more people following him this time. "Shh, I'm here, I'm here. Al, can you describe the room you're in? Is it a meeting room, entertainment room, bathroom…?"

_"C-chairs, table… meet-meeting roo-m."_

"Okay, thank you for telling me," Canada's voice was soothing just the way he knew that would calm Alfred. "I think this one is it."

He entered the room and saw Alfred in the corner, head bowed and body shaking with his arms around himself.

"Oh, Alfred…" He sighed and walked over to him. "Come here, I'll make it better."

Alfred dove into Matthew's arm and cried, clutching onto his brother's hoodie. "Matthew, I want to get help! Please! I don't care what I say the day before the appointment or a week before or minutes before, just get me help!"

Matthew was shocked for a moment before his face softened into a smile and he hugged his twin brother back. "I will, Alfred, I promise. And I promise they'll be nice and helpful, they won't laugh at you and we'll be here for you."

Alfred cried into Matthew's shoulder, the letter had flown from his hands and slid across the floor in front of the door. But he didn't care at the moment. Maybe he would later--his children did write it, after all--but right now, it was him and his brother.

The brother who had dealt with him screaming.

Dealt with him crying.

Dealt with him lashing out.

Dealt with the constant hospital trips.

Dealt with the denial.

The very same brother who had walked into the bathroom where he was forcing himself to throw up and managed to pull him away. Managed to help him stop throwing up as much.

He managed to break through the front he had put up for everyone.

He managed to put a little ray of light on his darkest moments.

He managed to stop him from trying to kill himself time and time again.

Matthew had sat in the waiting room _every time_ Alfred had collapsed due to stress, lack of sleep, malnutrition, dehydration.

Matthew had sat him down and gave him a gentle but stern talking to when he saw him on the edge of the Mackinac Bridge, completely ready to jump off.

Matthew had been there ever since he had found out, never turning Alfred away when he needed the support or just someone.

_Matthew had never once left him when it mattered the most._

Sure, they had their fights--like all siblings do--but they were close. They still _leaned_ on each other. They still _loved_ each other.

"You're the best brother anyone could have, Matthew." America said as his eyes closed.

Matthew smiled and pushed his brother's hair back, dropping a kiss on his head. "So are you, Alfred."

Kumajirou climbed off of Matthew's back and went onto Alfred's lap, gently licking his tears away. Canada picked up America and walked past France and England. As he went past the meeting room, he saw the Italies at the doorway with Spain and Mexico, peering at America while the other nations tried to look past them.

Matthew walked past everyone and went to a small break room. He laid Alfred down on the couch with Kumajirou cuddling the sleeping nation and turned to face the doorway.

"I assume you heard everything and read the letter."

France and England silently nodded, clutching the letter in between them.

"So. I'm going to give you one chance for these two choices," Canada said evenly, crossing his arms as he stared at his parental figures. "You can stay with the two of us as we get Alfred some help and watch as he hopefully gets better, or…" He swallowed nervously as his voice broke but quickly recovered. "Or you can turn around and pretend like you saw nothing that happened. You won't stay by Alfred and I; you can be in your own little world that Alfred and I will _never_ visit."

Silence. Canada drew himself up straighter, stiffening his pose and narrowing his eyes.

"So what will it be?"


	5. 5 - I Really Need To Come Up With Proper Chapter Names But Oh Well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm only eight days into the school year but right now I am honestly typing this whilst kinda paying attention to my AP US Government online course hahahaha
> 
> "WeLl, WhY dOeS gOvErNmEnT eVeN eXiSt???" -This random dude on the right of my online class screen.
> 
> I can't-

When Alfred awoke, he felt comfort.

"Mmm… Mattie?" He didn't open his eyes and just reached out his hand. "Dad? Alex*? Père? Lucy*? Matt?" He tiredly slurred.

_*Lucy is Montana's human name and Alex is Michigan's._

His hand was grabbed and he relaxed, sinking back into the surface below him.

Suddenly a ball of fur climbed further up his body and licked his face.

"Mmm--no." Alfred giggled and tried to push the furball away.

"Who?"

Alfred sighed and sat up, holding the furball in one arm and groping around for his glasses with his other. "I dunno right now, give me a sec."

His glasses were placed in his hand and he gave a quiet thanks. Sliding them on, he finally opened his eyes. "Looks like I'm Canada right now."

"No, I just changed you into my clothes because I knew you'd be more comfortable waking up in them," Canada said, walking into the room with a tray. "Hey England, could you give me his jacket? I'm cold."

Alfred slowly blinked as he watched his father figure and brother exchange items--Canada getting Alfred's jacket and England getting the tray. "En… Engla… nd? England?" He took his glasses off then put them back on. Still there. France was next to him too. Just because he called out for them didn't mean he wanted them there right at _this_ moment! "Kuma, are you seeing what I'm seeing?"

"England and France," Kumajirou said with a shrug before leaning over to the tray that was put down and taking the fish off of it. "And food."

Alfred sighed and looked at Canada for an explanation.

"They know about the real you--well, some of the real you--and I offered to either let them stay and help or abandon us. They, of course, stayed," Canada ran a hand through his hair and smiled a little. "Now on the subject of you, how are you feeling? You wore yourself out earlier."

"T-tired…" America stuttered, glancing at France and England out of the corner of his eye. _Oh god, they're going to laugh at me! Should I just run away? Say I'm fine? Convince them that it was a prank? I dunno, anything!_

Kumajirou bumped his head into America's chest and scolded him. "Slower breathing. No panic. Food."

"You're not my mom." America protested weakly, but was seized by England.

"Calm down, you bloody wanker! No one's going to laugh at you! And if someone does, we'll stab them, okay?"

" _L'Angleterre,_ isn't that a little counterproductive? Give the poor boy a little space," France dragged Britain away a little and held him hostage in his arms. "But he does have a point. No one will laugh."

Alfred blinked, slowly calming down. How was he supposed to react to this? "Er, thanks… I think…" _Get me out of this awkward situation!_

_"JOHN CENA!!!!!!!!!!!! ♫♬♩𝅗𝅥𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅰𝅘𝅥𝅲𝅘𝅥𝅲𝅘𝅥𝅲𝅘𝅥𝅲𝅘𝅥𝅲𝅘𝅥𝅲♫♬-"_

Alfred sighed in relief and answered the phone. "Yes?"

_"Dad, where are you?! You were supposed to be home three hours ago, did you have another panic attack or something? Should I come get you? Should I bring a weapon?!"_

"Lucy, please, no weapons," Alfred sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm f-"

_"Complete bullshit, Dad. I'm gonna drive over!"_

"Lucy, you'll be pulled over by the cops if you do that and I don't want to bail another one of you troublemakers out of jail or juvie again."

_"Cops, schmops."_

"Lucy…" He said, a heavy warning tone in his voice.

 _"Okay, okay, fine,"_ Silence. _"_ _Uh, so when will you be home? Hawaiʻi is crying over his cereal and we can't calm him down."_

"Have you tried, I dunno, giving him _another bowl of cereal_?"

 _"What are we, idiots?!"_ Muffled shouts of agreement were sounded. _"Oh, shut it. But anyway, he's also crying for you to come home. Alaska has been on edge too. Nevada is also in serious need of a bath, she got into the baby powder again."_

"Right, okay. I'll be there soon. Try not to kill any of your siblings." Alfred hung up and sighed, getting off the couch and gathering up his bag.

"Where are you going?" France asked, still holding England in his arms.

"To my real house, something's come up."

"Real house? You mean you have another house?"

Alfred yawned and rubbed his eyes. "Yup, got to fit a lot of people in there."

"We're coming too, Al," Matthew put a hand on America's shoulder. "You're in no condition to drive and you look like you might pass out on us at any moment."

"Mmm." America just agreed.

\---

The door opened.

"I'm home!" Alfred whispered, but somehow that soft voice caused a stampede sound.

"Dad!" Montana reached Alfred first, throwing herself at him.

Texas was behind her, hugging him in a more dignified manner. "Hey Pops."

"You look terrible." America told him, gently smoothing down his hair.

"Thanks. Y'all want food?"

"Sure…" Alfred said, getting his foot stepped on by Matthew. "Chill, I'm going to eat!"

"Mhm. Use the bathroom before we sit down."

A toddler clung to Kumajirou and giggled. "Mama, lookie! Lookie! Ku-ma-jiii!"

Alfred bent down and scooped the toddler up. "Yes, Kumajirou. Did you get your cereal?"

"Mhm! Good ceeereee-al!"

"Okay, then bed time for you."

"No… Wanna stway…" Hawaiʻi groaned, leaning his cheek on Alfred's shoulder. He then saw new people and his eyes lit up, making grabby hands. "Hold! Hold! Hold!"

"You want Uncle Mattie to hold you?"

"No! Down!" Hawaiʻi squirmed until Alfred put him down. He toddled unsteadily to England and held onto his legs. "Up! Up!"

England bent down and cautiously picked up the toddler. "Hello, little chap, who are you?"

"Jai Jones, or Ha-way-eeeee! Who're you?"

"Arthur Kirkland, personification of England." Arthur glanced at Alfred, who was picking up a toddler completely covered with powder and laughing.

"An' you?" Jai asked, pointing to France.

"Francis Bonnefoy, representing France."

"Mmm. How you know Mama?"

Arthur and Francis looked at each other. "Uh…"

"Jai, they're your Grandparents," Canada chipped in, being mauled by at least seven kids. "Speaking of, everyone needs to meet you."

"I got this," Montana grinned. "Be back in a few~!"

"Try not to kill your siblings."

"Right, Uncle Mattie!"

"So, _mon fils_ , you knew about all of these children?"

"Yeah. I have some of my own too."

"What!" France yelped, clinging onto England by snaking his arms around his waist. "My life is a lie…"

"I don't have as many as Al does, certainly," Canada commented, hugging Florida when the state slid down the staircase railing and jumped into his arms. "I only have personifications of my provinces and territories. I wonder if they're here?"

"They're somewhere around here. Maybe in the yard," Texas appeared in the doorway, holding a baby. "Want to take care of Wyoming for a while?"

"Of course. Oh! Père, England, this is the personification for Texas."

Texas waved and handed the baby to Canada with a yawn. He was dragged into a hug with his uncle and he just slumped there for a while. "'M tired…"

"I know. Go get some rest, you deserve it. We got two extra people here right now, so don't worry. Did you eat yet?" Texas groaned and shook his head. "Eat first, brush your teeth, then go to bed, okay?"

"Yes Tío Mattie," He muttered and straightened up. "Pleasure meeting you, uh I actually don't know what to call you yet so I'll just leave it at that."

Montana came running down the stairs screaming, "IT'S ALIVE AND READY FOR MURDER!"

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO DISRUPT MY HAPPY TIME!"

"YOU WERE ON THE PHONE WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND SO I THOUGHT YOU WOULD BE HAPPY FOR ONCE!"

"SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!"

A few snorts sounded throughout the house. Six rooms away you hear someone fall down, wheezing.

"You keep believing that, hun," California said, carrying a mug of hot chocolate. "Have a drink and be happy and calm!"

"I hate you all," Alex informed them as they sipped the hot chocolate. "Hey, Uncle Mat, who're they?"

"Your grandparents," Matthew said, feeding a sleepy baby. "Everyone introduce yourselves now, and be polite."

As everyone introduced themselves, England and France looked a little overwhelmed but quite happy as they were surrounded by children and teens.

"Lily Jones, personification of New York! I almost never get sleep but I'm _FiNe!_ "

Alfred walked into the room with a clean toddler. "Off you go, Nevada. Be free, child of mine."

As soon as he put Nevada down, he slumped on the couch and closed his eyes.

"You alright, Al?"

"Killer headache," He groaned. "Who hasn't eaten?"

Multiple states went into the dining room as he said this and got food.

"You haven't eaten yet either, Al."

"I don't _wanna_ get up."

England sighed, still holding Hawaiʻi. "America, where is Jai's bedroom?"

"This floor, left side, has a green and blue door with stickers that spell out 'Hawaiʻi' and 'Nevada'."

"Mama… wanna go bed…" Hawaiʻi whined, stretching his arms out to Alfred.

Alfred slowly stood, wincing, and kissed Hawaiʻi's head. "Iggy's going to take you there, okay? Be nice."

"Mhm!"

Alfred smiled and let England go with his child, France trailing behind. As soon as they left the room, he massaged his temples and rummaged in the drawer next to the couch. He took out a pill bottle and helped himself to two of them.

"Is it your economy?" Matthew asked, leading Puerto Rico over to a deliriously happy France.

"I don't think so, I think Barack would call me if it was."

_"♪Obama~ Only the greatest~ The very greatest of the great! ♫ He was born in America, we promise! Oh~ Obama, lick-"_

Alfred laughed and answered his phone. "Yo."

_"Oh good, you answered. I thought it might have been Matthew or one of your offspring."_

"Nope, it's me. Is something wrong?"

_"Our economy is looking a little down."_

"I'm sadly already aware of that. Do you know why?"

_"War efforts against ISIS. I'm really sorry."_

"No, no, it's fine. I'm used to it."

_"I don't know if you know this, but that isn't good."_

"Psh, it's _f_ _ine_."

Obama sighed over the phone. _"Don't come in tomorrow, you don't sound so good. Can you hand the phone to your brother?"_

"Sure. Hey Mattie, Barack wants to talk to you."

"Hey Barack. Need anything?"

 _"Other than free healthcare?"_ They both snorted. _"Just make sure Alfred doesn't come in tomorrow, he doesn't sound good. Tie him to his bed or hand him to Ivan, I don't care."_

Matthew gave off a smirk. "I'll be glad to do both of those things~! Might speed up the _Plan~!_ "

"I don't know what you're talking about, but I think I should start fearing for myself now."

"SWEET HOME ALABAMA~!"

"MONTANA!" Alfred screamed, flipping off the ceiling above them.

"IF I HEAR ONE MORE INCEST JOKE OR THAT SONG AGAIN I WILL SKIN YOU ALIVE!"

"THAT'S NOT VERY GENTLEMANLY OF YOU--GET AWAY FROM ME! PUT THE KNIFE DOWN! NOT THE GUN!"

"NO MURDER IN MY HOUSE!"

America sighed and slumped back on the couch, drawing the blanket over his face to block out the sunlight.

"Al… you still have to eat."

"'M fine without."

"You're going to eat _something_ , dammit! I don't care how little it is, as long as you eat something!"

"Pass me a carrot then."

"Five carrots and a biscuit."

"Two carrots and half a biscuit."

"Four carrots and a biscuit."

"Three carrots and a biscuit is my final offer."

Matthew sighed and got up. "I'll take that. Go to the bathroom first."

A laugh rang out of the toddler's room and Hawaiʻi yelled, "Kumajiiiiiiiiiiiiii~!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... Yes, the Obama ringtone is something I made up. No, my mind is not okay. No, you may never hear the rest of it. R.I.P.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first time I've ever finished posting a story before, I really hope you all enjoyed! Uhm, I also have other Hetalia stories so... check them out? :)

"Niiiiiiiñññooooooooo~"

Alfred whined a bit but returned to a restful sleep in a matter of seconds.

"Niño, ahora de despertar~" (it's time to wake u~p)

Alfred let out a huff and nudged the hand away. "Can… sado…" (T… ired…)

"Pero los países están aquí, Niño." (But the countries are here)

"¿Entonces?" (So?) Alfred yawned and snuggled the child he was holding. "Déjalos, que se joda~n. Yo duer~mo, ellos resuelven las cosas por su cuenta~." (Let them be, fu~ck them. I sle~ep, they figure out things on their own~.)

"Niño… ¿Al menos, te mueves al la sofá?" (At least move to the sofa?)

"Noooooo…" Alfred closed his eyes, nuzzled into Alaska's hair and fell asleep.

\---

The next time Alfred woke up was to a wailing baby.

He yawned as he padded out of the room, Alaska attached to his hip as per insistence. He rubbed his right eye with his free hand, walking to the source of the wailing.

He heard people panicking inside as he was approaching.

"Dammit, I don't know if I can get him to calm down without Dad right now-"

"Ai ya, he probably doesn't know the first thing about raising a child, give the baby to me, aru."

"How about we visit Fedya while he is sleeping? Kolkolkolkol…"

Alfred walked into the room and it fell silent, minus the baby still screaming his head off. He held up his finger, put Alaska down, and took the child into his arms before walking to the kitchen. "Ayóó anííníshní, ayóó anííníshní," (I love you, I love you,) Alfred cooed quietly as the baby stopped crying almost immediately at the voice. "Shh, ayóó anííníshní, Sheʼashkii yázh." (I love you, my little child.)

As soon as the microwave beeped he grabbed the warm bottle and sat on the floor. "Ashą́~" (Eat~)

The baby suckled on the bottle, now content. Alaska had gone back to clinging onto Alfred, the countries were staring in amazement, and Alfred was dozing off with his head against the counters. The only thing keeping him from falling asleep was the two children that would either require assistance or affection.

"Sheʼashkii yázh," (My little child,) Alfred sighed out, taking the bottle away since the child had emptied it as much as he would. The baby cooed and reached for Alfred. "Aoo'~?" (Yes~?)

"Et-Etshi~"

A smile took over his tired features. "Yáʼátʼéehgo, Sheʼashkii yázh." (Good job, my little child.)

"Etsi~" The baby said clearly, then blabbered a few discernable words.

"Aoo', aoo'." (Yes, yes.)

Alfred cuddled the two children closer and rested his head against the cabinets, falling asleep almost immediately.

"Ma… Pa? Oi, Pa? Mama, dear sweet birthgiver of ours, please wake up."

Alfred opened his eyes. "I went to sleep at six A.M. because of this freaking headache I have, so _please_ let me slee~p…"

Alex shook her head. "Not on the floor, Мамочка."

"Почему нет?" (Why not?) Alfred mumbled. "Я уже здесь, я устал, я хочу спать. Идеальный рецепт." (I'm already here, I'm tired, I wanna sleep. Perfect recipe.)

"Нет-" (No-) Alex sighed. "Мамочка~ Пойдем в твою спальню или на диван. Это удобнее." (Let's go to your bedroom, or the couch. It's more comfortable.)

Alfred mumbled out some nonsensical words as he nodded off again.

"Goddammit--hey, who's got strength?"

Ivan immediately stepped forward.

"Yeah, okay, cool. Russia, Ivan, Braginski, whatever the fuck you wanna be called, lift them up and follow me."

Russia did just that, then followed the teen down a hallway of a few doors.

"His bedroom. I'm sure you can find his bed," Alex made to leave but paused. "And no funny business, just put them to bed and try to make sure they're comfy."

"Ufu~ да~"

"Хорошо." (Good.)

\---

Alfred woke and jumped out of bed, turning off his alarm and quickly getting dressed. "Goddammit, where's my hat?!"

"Lad, what are you doing, and why in such a rush?"

Arthur paused in the doorway with Yao to see Alfred spin around and drop a sunhat, his dress fluffing out.

"Nice colour dress, I'm jealous…" Yao muttered, staring at the blue dress.

Alfred blushed to the tip of his ears and shook his head, putting the sunhat on to hide his face as he tried to slip past the others quietly.

"Oh thank goodness, I thought you'd forgotten!" A child bounded up to Alfred and hugged him tight, causing the countries out and about to look over at--presumably--Alfred.

"O-of course not! Do you have such little faith in your Etsi?"

"No, no," The child, Charlie, smiled. "Anyway, shall we be going? The children shouldn't be kept waiting for long!"

"They're _your_ classmates." Alfred muttered as he was pulled out of the house.

"I know, I know! Come on, Etsi~!"

"Wha-!"

\---

The countries totally did not follow the child and Alfred.

Nope.

That's not the reason they were sitting next to Alfred in a theatre.

Mere coincidence, really.

And it is most certainly not the reason they were all watching the concert with wide eyes and attentive ears, enjoying the classical music flooding over them.

Absolutely not.

\---

Alfred gathered his child into an embrace as soon as they got close enough. "You were amazing up there."

"Thank you, Etsi," Charlie grinned and dropped kisses on Alfred's cheeks. They then looked at the countries, blushing. "Y'all decided to join? I hope you enjoyed it…"

The countries rushed to praise the violist, making them beam with joy.

"Th-thank you all very much for your compliments!" Charlie grinned and hugged the one closest to them--Germany, it so happened to be.

"Hey kiddo, we've got your favourite movie waiting for when we get home."

"Really?!" Charlie gasped and threw theirself at Alfred. "Let's go, let's go!"

Alfred laughed as he allowed himself to be dragged for the second time that day, the countries this time following very much in his sight instead of trying to sneak around.

Later, they were all bundled up watching Spaceballs. Alfred tore his gaze off of the movie to take in his surroundings again.

Looking around at his family and friends, he surmised that maybe, just maybe, healing wouldn't be as bad as he thought if it meant that he could spend better times with the loving people surrounding him. Sure, it would take time and cause a lot of frustration, but…

Someone leant down and murmured, "Are you alright?"

He sent a blinding smile their way before replying, "... Yes."

And he meant it.

He was alright, he was about to be even better.

All it took was getting caught once to kickstart this revelation.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for joining me, again, and if you liked it, you can maybe even check out some of my other writings...? Haha, thank you again!


End file.
